Myself as a Writer

            As a writer I have always been taught that grammar, punctuation, and spelling are what makes a paper great. However, I was always confused with this concept. I have always loved reading, and I noticed that in many books, or other pieces of literature, often the grammar was not correct in order to emphasize the voice of the author, or the specific speech of a character. The punctuation was always very confusing. It seemed like there were exceptions for everything, and no punctuation had a concrete definition. I understood that a period completed a sentence, but when it came to commas I had not the slightest clue what was correct or incorrect, and ultimately it just took a great amount of practice and becoming familiar with the little guys. I noticed that words were occasionally misspelled, although with spell check these days spelling no longer really concerns me. After all of this being said, I actually liked writing papers. I thought it was rather cool how stories would just piece themselves together in my mind, and then I would end up with, what I thought was, a brilliant piece of work with all sorts of characters, a unique setting, and an important theme. However, it was always a struggle for me to communicate my ideas on to paper, and I truly dreaded the process of transferring my sophisticated ideas on to paper, but once I had finished I enjoyed the results.

            Goodman’s article “Calming the inner critic and getting to Work” is something that I wish I would have read a long time ago. I feel like I’m confessing at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting when I say that I have struggled with the inner critic for as long as I can remember. The source of my long hours writing papers came from the fact that I honestly was so caught up with what each paragraph, sentence, and word would come across as to the teacher. Would he or she consider it grammatically correct? Did my sentence have enough detail? Was the format of it correct? Should I rearrange where this or that goes? Where was I even going with this long and drawn out statement? I constantly battled with these questions until I got so frustrated I just needed to quit. After reading Goodman’s ideas, and possibly the simple fact that I am writing for a blog, and my teacher is awesome and doesn’t worry about grammar, I feel every word flows so easily. It is almost as if I am carrying on a conversation with myself that has no roadblocks or random dead ends. I am sure all of these things play a part in my new found success when it comes to writing, but I can’t help but think that it is also the fact that I have come to the realization that writing is simply a form of communication. I communicate in so many ways with so many people on a daily basis that writing really shouldn’t be too much different. It is just a process of recording an individual’s ideas in a way that can be preserved through history and could potentially become the next generation’s famous piece of literature. Whenever I have read famous novels in the past I have noticed that each one is unique. Sure authors sometimes write books that are similar to each other or have the same concepts and ideas, but it seems that the novels that are most famous are ones that involve ideas and creativity that no one has ever seen before. They took a risk when choosing to move past their inner critic and allow their thoughts to create full form. I believe that as a writer I should follow their path. I shouldn’t be caught up worrying that my idea will fail miserably or that no one will like it because a mindset like that can only hold back the pieces full potential. We as individuals are unique, and I think we should keep this in mind as we write as well. I believe that Goodman would agree with me. She talks about how when we have to risk falling on our face when writing, and isn’t that the same idea as showing people who you truly are? It is a risk no doubt, and sometimes people don’t accept you but I would say for the most part people are accepting and appreciate your authenticity. In my mind this carries over to writing, and how there will be some people who criticize your writing, but there will also be those people who thoroughly enjoy what you have to say.

            As I was typing up my thoughts I took a break, and I realized that maybe the inner critic isn’t all bad. Isn’t there more than one side to everything? I thought to myself that the inner critic does have a purpose, and it is actually quite useful. Sure as we write the inner critic slows us down immensely, and sometimes even to the point where we completely give up, but the inner critic is crucial in the revision process. The inner critic allows us to scrutinize our work, looking for every little detail, and try to perfect it. It is what takes a good paper, and makes it great. Now it may seem as though I am contradicting myself and saying two opposite opinions at once, but what I am really try to say is we need to be able to control our inner critic. It may take a bit of practice and getting used to, but if we are able to turn our inner critics on and off, I believe this is what makes a writer a professional. Professional writers know how to flow through the writing process, being confident in their ideas and overcoming the inner critic. However, when they know they have finished and have come to the conclusion that they have no more to add, they are able to completely change their mindset, turning on their inner critic, and using it to organize their ideas in a format that is most understandable to their audience. They catch any grammar or punctuation that would truly throw off the meaning of a sentence, and they are able to tie their ideas together with words that are precise and relevant to the paper. In the past I have always been awful at the revision process due to the fact that I was just ready to be done with the paper. I had said what I had wanted to, and I guess I just hoped that it came across to the audience in the way that I had intended. I also would always tell myself that I would have my teacher or a friend who was better than me at writing revise my paper, and once again I would end up being too lazy to actually get help with revising my work. I hope that I can learn to control my inner critic, and use it to my advantage for the revision process. I honestly don’t strive to be a professional writer by any means, but I believe that being able write and revise a paper effectively is a valuable skill to have for the work field, not to mention getting through college courses. I think it will just take the ability to focus on my work, and spend a little extra time looking at it once I am finished. I believe asking for help is also something that I can use to strengthen the quality of my writing piece.

            These are my opinions on the good and the bad aspects of the inner critic. Obviously I may be completely wrong in my ideas, but I feel that the way I have described them should provide support for each argument.

            Originally when I started writing I planned on writing to my college peers. I feel that it is still spoken to them, but I also feel that I have written it to myself as well.